


Together

by LillithMiles



Series: What was? [2]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Ian Gallagher-centric, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-17
Updated: 2018-12-17
Packaged: 2019-09-20 16:07:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17025819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LillithMiles/pseuds/LillithMiles
Summary: After their first night together in prison, Ian is determined to have a honest talk with Mickey.





	Together

**Author's Note:**

> This is kind of a continuation of my "What Was?" story, but can be read as a stand alone, I think.  
> Also, I need to mention that I have no idea how penitentiaries work, but for all intents and purposes, in this one, Ian takes his medication on the infirmary, in front of a nurse or doctor, as part of his prison deal. Guards take him there everyday, first thing in the morning. Also also, they're a bit OOC but I tried so hard and got so far... /crying.  
> Also³, unbeated and english isn't my first language.

Ian inhaled deeply the scent on Mickey’s neck as he woke up. He had fallen asleep the night before glued to his skin, after that most teary make out session of his life. He snuggled a bit before start moving. Getting up, he sat on the bed, trying to not move Mickey to not wake him up.

 

They had stayed up for hours just kissing and touching and crying. Mickey trying not to let actual tears fall (like the Tough Guy™ he always was) and Ian, way passed that, openly sobbing against his shoulder. He remembered all their time together, through a fog on the times he was too manic or too sedated, but Mickey never really left his mind or his heart. He regretted not being able to enjoy their relationship like he should. He was better now, his meds were working, he was clean (for the most part, only sharing an occasional joint with Lip. He even tried to reduce the cigarettes and the booze), he had secured a stable job and wasn't hypersexual anymore (one of the things that hurt more was remember that he had cheated on Mickey. Several times).

 

He looked at the other man's face, lax with sleep. His resolve of being completely honest with him strengthened, even if after the talk, Mickey decided he didn't want him anymore. The prospect was terrifying, but he needed to be honest with Mickey. He wanted to make things the right way this time. He wanted to be able to enjoy his moments with him.

 

Looking at the other man's face, Ian couldn't help smiling. He probably was dreaming ‘cause his eyebrows, always so fucking expressive, were moving a bit. Mickey was so strong and resilient, he could survive anything. Ian had hurt him so many times and yet, here they were, a new chance in their hands. This time, he'd make it right.

 

He was still staring when Mickey scrunched up his face a little and opened his eyes, blinking to clear his vision. When their eyes met, he felt nervous. The previous night was filled with kisses and tears. The time for the real talk came now. And he had a lot to get off his chest. He just hoped Mickey still thought him worth the effort after he said everything.

 

“Morning.”, he said softly, wanting to go for a kiss, but not sure if he should. He had screwed up many times before, he couldn't help to be cautious.

 

“Is it morning, already?” He ran a hand over his face and through his hair and looked at Ian. The (previous) redhead smiled when the soft “C’mere” left Mickey’s lips and wasted no time in kissing his… boyfriend? He wasn't sure, but it wasn't important at the moment.

 

He tried to keep things light, guards were probably wandering around in their cell block and soon they would be taken to the cafeteria for breakfast. They didn't need to put up a show (obviously, not Ian or Mickey were shy; they had fooled around in public places enough times that was a miracle nobody they knew hadn't spot them. But they were new here and it wouldn't be good to shock the guards right away with a sex scene so early in the morning. Ian had no doubt it would happen, eventually, but it didn't need to be right away). And Ian had many important things to say, so it would do them no good to heat things up.

 

He moved his lips to Mickey’s cheeks and eyelids, forehead and chin, before kissing him in the mouth once again and sitting up straight on the bed. Mickey’s eyes, that amazing shade of blue they were, were bit glassy and Ian smiled before remembering he had a lot to say.

 

“Mick, we need to talk.”

 

“Wanna have a heart to heart, Fire crotch?”, he smirked, but it didn't reach his eyes.

 

“Yes.” He looked down and took a deep breath before facing Mickey again. “I think it's time for us, well,  for _me_ to be honest with you.”

 

He saw Mickey frowning and crossing his arms, before nodding. A tear welled up, but he quickly wiped it out. Even after all the crying he did the previous night, he still had some more to shed, apparently.

 

“I'm so sorry. For everything. For pushing you away all those times, for disappointing you, hurting you and make you feel like you should take care of me. _I_ should be taking care of myself. For me and for you. So I could enjoy our moments together. So I could really be with you instead of slutting around, stealing suitcases, trying to murder people, kidnapping babies-”, he choked up and took a breath, running a hand through his hair. Mickey reached up to comfort him but Ian shook his head. He still had more to say and couldn't lose the nerve. It wouldn't do good to drag this out. He needed to finish.

 

“I don't deserve you. That's the truth. You're the best thing that happened to me and I took you for granted and acted like a stupid prick. I knew how much of a homophobic psycho your father was and I resented you for obeying him when he forced you to marry Svetlana. He almost killed both of us when he caught us together and I kept pushing you to go against him! I only thought about myself! I demanded you to come out, what right did I have?” Ian ran his hands through his hair again and got up from the bed. He started pacing, barely making three steps before turning and walking the other direction. “I was so selfish. I should be punched in the face! Do you wanna punch me? You have every right to do!”

 

“Ian, I ain't gonna punch you.”

 

“You should! Hell, I want you to. What I did to you was so wrong, Mick… But, you came to find me anyway. In that club, stripping and turning tricks for money. Already surfing on the high wave of Monica's inheritance.” He said, bitterly. “You brought me back home and stayed with me. And against all judgement, didn't stop me from going back. You never liked that I danced there but you never tried to stop me, like, never demanded that I stopped or you would leave me. Like I did. And instead of being fucking thankful for having you and being with you, I decided to fuck up again and not take care of myself like I was suppose to. And, the cherry on top, thinking I was right in not taking my meds like I was supposed to, I broke up with you. The only person I've ever loved and I pushed you away again…”

 

He stopped pacing and sat on the bed again, against the wall. He looked in the direction of  the door, not really seeing it. “I don't really think I should have gone with you to Mexico. A change like that could mess me up bad. I wanted to go, but it would be too risky. I managed to get my shit together, had a stable job, meds were working… But I didn't forget you. I kept thinking about how you were doing, if you were happy or how things would be if I was there with you… I never forgot you. I dated after we broke up, yes, but I didn't love them. not the way I love you.”

 

Mickey tsked at the mention of Ian dating. “Yeah, I remember you saying you had a boyfriend... Didn't stop you from coming to see me.” Ian looked at him and noticed the smug expression on his face. Ian couldn't help smiling. He felt bad for cheating on Trevor, but there was something about Mickey that he couldn't resist. Like every other person he ever been with were just interludes until he was with Mickey again.

 

“Yeah, it didn't last long… After we-”

 

“Fucked all night and drove all the way to Mexican border? Ian, we're past that. I know all the shit you did, I was there, front seat. You don't have to explain yourself to me.”

 

“I do. I mean, obviously you were there, but I want you to understand that I _know_ what I did. And I'm sorry! For everything.  I regret every single time I hurt I hurt you. And I'm not going back through that path. I'm better now and I want to keep it that way. And I want to be with you because I love you and I promise you that I'll do everything I can to not drag us through that hell again.” He took Mickey’s hand and pressed a kiss on it.

 

“Yeah, I hope so, Tough Guy. Because after all the shit we've been through, we deserve some peace.” He pulled Ian for a deep kiss, their hands instinctively touching the other's face. The older man leaned back after a while and looked at Ian’s face, suddenly serious. “But since we’re being honest and shit, I need to ask something.” Ian nodded, a little anxious. Mickey raised a hand and messed with Ian's hair. “Why the fuck did you do this, man?”

 

Ian laughed and Mickey joined him. He punched his boyfriend in the shoulder for the joke. “I know, everyone hated it, me included. And now, you too…” He ran his fingers through it, self-conscious. “I’ll trim it as soon as possible, be a redhead again…” He knew Mickey liked gingers. Or maybe he liked gingers because of him. Whatever it was, it made him smile and lean forward to kiss the Mickey again. At some point, he started chuckling against Mickey’s lips.

 

“What’s so funny, Red?”

 

“Our happy ending is happening in a fucking prison...”

 

“Happy end- Could you be more gay, Gallagher? Jesus...”

 

“Yeah, I could suck your dick… Is that gay enough for you?”, answered Ian, reaching down to to grope his boyfriend, who laughed as well.

 

Soon the guards would be calling them, taking Ian to infirmary for his first pills of the day and then to the cafeteria to eat. He had no idea how things would be from then on, but he knew he could face it. He was with Mickey again. Together, they could face everything.

 

 

 

 

-*-*-*-

Sorry for the sappy ending, I just really needed to finish this!


End file.
